Sinus

Over the last two days my sinuses have been kicking my ass, my face hurts in ways I didn’t know it could and I feel like I’ve just been sucker punched. Last night I had a grilled cheese with carrot sticks and fruit juice in a Cinderella cup for dinner (I don’t have kids, it’s my cup). I’ve reverted to being 5 years old.

I went to work this afternoon, then came home and buried a crater in my couch and zoned out while Glee played in the background. It wasn’t until I caught Fenn staring at me that I realized I should probably peel myself up and do something. I was hungry, since the abundance of snot hasn’t allowed for much of an appetite. I decided I had enough energy to cook dinner, made a quick trip into the grocery store and spent more money than I had intended. Chips were on sale (I never buy myself chips, I can eat a whole bag in one sitting if I let myself) so I threw a tiny pity party and bought a bag. Of course the one time I do, the cashier says, “oh, looks like you’re going to have a good night”. What does that even mean? Was she judging my one and only chip purchase?

I ate half the bag on the way home.

I set Pandora to the acoustic guitar station (one of my favorites) and began preparing dinner, an asian inspired stir-fry (a big age step-up from the previous night) full of crunchy green vegetables, and sweet light shellfish. Something about the combination of the soothing music playing and the act of mindlessly chopping ingredients I found myself in a trance-like state, my happy place. I forgot about everything else (it’s been a hectic week, apartment hunting is a major pain, for those of you who don’t know, especially when you’re doing it from out of town) and just lived in the moment, completely lost in the act. (If you’ve ever seen that scene from Ratatouille when Reme creates flavor combinations in his head, that was me, look it up). It was like a sign that I’m going in the right direction in my life, that what I have planned for my future is what I’m supposed to do. In all of the sickness, stress, money, work, housing, worries, problems it was my little moment of peace and clarity.

I ate my happy dinner, sitting back in my crater on the couch, watching Bridget Jones Diary (which I had never seen, loved, and would highly recommend to any single girl out there).